Archive for Januari 2014

A Turning Point

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HAI. kangen sama gue nggak? Enggak ya, yaudah...

So, I'm on holiday for one month, yay! I decided to write on my blog again.
Why? Why I disappeared back then? Well, maybe I was just focus on national exams and stuffs back then but now I'm here! At Bogor Agricultural University. An unordinary college, I think... I met a lot of interesting people and I learn new things, I've got new hobbies, such as: reading a free pdf novel, cooking, crafting and that was good. I feel like I gained my self-esteem back (What?) but seriously, I was a pathetic person with no self-esteem back then. I realized that I wrote my blog just because I was too depressed to tell anyone. And I'm just doing the same now. What a pathetic person I am.

College's not scary. I can cope up with the lecture, and... Well, with the people in it. So why are you depressed?

Well maybe it's just because the group-thing. You know. I'm not a type that can cope up with that group-thing matter. I'm a loner and I'm okay with that. What's the problem? I can eat by myself, I can go anywhere just by myself and I'm okay with that! I don't need those bunch of friends to accompany me everywhere and everytime. But some people are just.... not okay with that. They saw me like a loner monster. Wow! How amazing. That's great. Thank you.

But it doesn't mean that I don't have any friends here. I have soooo much friends here. I told myself that I should be good to anyone. And I did that. And I'm good to anyone. And because of that. I never have a close friend, you know? But... Why I couldn't be me??

I'm not a type of person that just talk to several person and avoid the rest. Like making a closed group that only several people can get inside.

Well, gue jujur gue pas SMA sama temen-temen gue emang ngebuat closed-group like that. Kenapa? Because we were different than other classes and that made us... A little weird.

"Aksel" is weird. At least that's what other people think about us.

But now, everyone is the same. So why did they make such a closed-group?? Like making a gap between closed-groups and anyone. Closed-group ini nggak cuma satu loh. Ada banyak. Dan lu nggak memikirkan apa yang terjadi pada orang-orang yang nggak punya grup?

Gue pernah nyapa orang yang ngebuat closed-group like that. And she doesn't even looked at my eyes.  I know she hear my voice but she didn't care

And this is why I hated the society so much.

Remember my old posts? I had posted a post like this before.
I'm sorry, sorry kalo post ini sedikit sarkastik dan nyenggol kalian, buat kalian yang ngerasa sih ya. Hahahaha. Susah nih, kesarkastikan gue makin susah dibendung. Sorry

I wrote everything that's on my mind. Is that wrong?